Saturday November 15, 2014

It is amazing to me how little sleep I can live on, I tried to sleep past my 3 am alarm and I still woke up at 5 am cause Patches woke up and started barking for me to get up and let him out, I thought he needed to pee but when I opened the door “Ball sack” was there waiting for his breakfast bowl, Ball sack is the neighbors dog, he has me obedience trained to feed him..he’s an old dog, the son of my old dog ” Spot” .. Spot died about the same time as my Daddy. Daddy died Jan 10, 1999.
I miss my Dad, he was a good man. He liked Dr. Kevorkian, last night I told my son about Daddy and Dr. Kevorkian, mostly that my Dad said that he was right in his opinion that people should have the right to determine when they want to die and be euthanized if they are suffering… We watched a movie on Netflix about Dr. Kevorkian, I asked Bryan if he knew about how his Grandpa died, he said all he knew was that he died in the back yard of his house in an ice storm..checking on a puppy..
The whole story is that. My Dad went out in the cold because his Dr. told him that if he went out in the freezing cold with his very bad congestive heart failure that his heart would stop, Daddy told me his Dr. told him that about a year earlier, I said, ” you better stay in the house then”.. He just looked at me with this eye lock he had and said ” Well, I guess I know what to do when the cancer gets bad..” He had a puppy in the outbuilding that he was probably saying good bye to, anyway he was dressed up in his Sunday clothes, and he had his false teeth in which he only wore when he went out in public, cause he had lost so much weight that they didn’t fit anymore..he told my sister a few days earlier that he had decided to die on Sunday cause it was God’s day..so he got up early around 5 am and went outside into the ice storm, he told me that he had decided he didn’t want to die laying in a bed in the house, that he wanted to die standing up on his own two feet and outside, cause he liked being outside and he didn’t want his house to be haunted..he said choosing how we die is our last freedom we have…

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